Life

...is good right now. I am studying something I love (and still not handing things in on time), I have a job ($), and girls are everywhere. My social life has taken a hit, but I'm actually pretty cool with that.
I don't like groups anyway. Too much pressure and politics and swinging of dicks. Hmm...that could be a cop out. I like groups when I'm the centre of attention, but otherwise I get really bored and disdainful of those who are doing what I probably subconsciously want to be doing myself (dominating).

Previously I thought that the healthiness of my current state of mind was due to positive thinking habits, but I think it may be more to do with the makeup of my life. The little, obvious things like money and having a job, following my life path and chasing women. The thoughts that I have continued to plant in my head...it's hard to say. They would have come to fruition around the same time I started uni and work. I suppose that I believed them to be pivotal at one point before. I should trust past Dan. He's a good guy.

Women are interesting right now. As per before there are legions of could be causes, but for whatever reason, they are flocking (weight loss and new clothes seem to be a big part...superficial pigfuckers). I spent pretty much all of yesterday talking to girls. I went to the doc, talking to Olivia in between (attempting to apologise for being a penis), had an extended lunch with Taylor in the botanical gardens (I think I may prefer her to stay as a friend - young and very prone to awkward), then came home and talked on the phone with Olivia for god knows how many hours. I somehow managed to talk to her even when I was stoned.
Special. She encouraged me to go out and get laid, so I did (came so close..)

On a side note I have a new dexamphetamine prescription. It is good to have but I must be careful. Too much can wig me out a bit and make me all wide eyed and wiry. A far cry from my standard chilledness, which I happen to quite like.

Anyway, I called up Al and convinced him to come wing me. He brought Seb along and we drank. I accidentally swiped a girl in the face while making some grand hand gesture. Seb told me he is in a grey place right now, something I am all too familiar with. He also said he noticed that I've changed since having a job. Confidence and just generally 'a better man.' Toot toot. He just needs to be busier. He's fallen into Dan Blundell bum mode. Rise at 12 and masturbate till dusk. He just needs a job. I advised him such. I also think he should break it off with his girl in Europe and start plowing the fertile Brisbane ground, but I will leave him uninfluenced in that regard.

After a couple of jugs and a gentle maiming, we hit the dfloor. I was on dexies and pretty excitable. Al told me to ask a couple of cute girls dancing together if they wanted a threesome. I was like 'aight,' and went in. I did it pretty much all with hand gestures. They laughed and said 'wishful thinking.' I laughed with them. They were pretty cool. Anyway that's really not all that interesting. I was groovin around for a bit when Al ushered me towards a blonde girl from Manchester. I said 'hey,' and immediately and naturally put my hand around her waist. She reciprocated. A few words about heritage while hands moved around. 'I lived in Kent.' Hand on neck. Make out.
Couches. Make out more. Exploring fingers. Leave never to be seen again.

More groovin, body movin. Saw the girl who looks like Em that I was macking on before the dragon swept me away a couple weeks back. We danced for a bit. Much facial expression. She is an actress I suppose. Cute. I always catch her looking at me, but I think she's trying to maintain a certain flighty air in my eyes. I'll probably see her next week.

Smoking area, ponce a cigarette. Tell a girl swathed in black she looks like she has a disdain for society. She laughs but is a bit non-committal. Mask for insecurity. A guy friend of hers comes over and she says 'save me.' Motherfucker!! She was smiling and obviously didn't need saving. Silly girl.

Standing there smoking on my own when a girl comes outside and makes the 'do you have a lighter' gesture at me. I shake my head, but as she comes closer I offer her my cigarette to light off. Somehow we end up with hands on each other right away. I swear it's like black voodoo, I don't know what it is. She tells me I'm adorable. She starts talking about how xena warrior princess is sexist. Our hands become more intimate. She wants to kiss me but I hold out and tease her a bit. We make out. Nice lips, but lacking passion. I say 'it's funny, you have very kissable lips, but it's like we need a connection first.' Haha can't imagine she's heard that one before. 'Funny creatures." We talk and kiss etc. Al comes over and I talk to him. She leaves us to it. He's like 'oh shit did I do that?' I'm like 'yep.' He apologizes profusely. 'Haha it's all good man let's go inside.' Go inside. Groove. Girl from outside starts dancing in vicinity. Go grab her. Dance. Good rhythm, good connection. Kiss. Wall. Kiss. Bitch pulls out some gum!!! lol. Kiss. Rubbing. Couch. Kiss. Checks her phone. Looks at me. Contemplates. I smile. She says she has to go. I say she should come home with me. She says he wants to but can't. I try to convince her further. She says she has to go home with a friend, that I'm adorable. Should have told her about my practical penis. I grab her number. She kisses me and leaves.

Text from al saying him and Seb left. Hang around dancing and making a few last minute moves. Told a girl she should dance with me. She said she likes to share her dancing around. I call her a communist. Nothing comes to fruition. Home. Sleep. Wank.