Recurring theme of fantasy as an outlet for repressed drives. My fantasies include Don Juan-esque swoopings of beautiful women (in actuality the femme is not specified, leading me to believe it is a fantasy more based around narcissistic ego fulfillment than the acquisition of some perfect female for my actual happiness), and unfathomed wins from acute genius level tactics in certain video/board games - perhaps a longing for the realisation of my intelligence in the digital realms (since is it not being aptly used in reality). As I type I immediately move the cursor to begin gaming again - to escape the potential failures of real effort in a simulated world with no consequences. But does the realisation of ego defence mechanisms mean anything if one is not willing to stand against them, willing rather to remain in the dark through conscious, albeit poorly rationalised, choice.
The serious character that emerges upon extended periods of reading or writing. The Dan that is preoccupied with his path, unphased as the world around pales into a blurred background.
Constant analysis as an eddy like diversion of mental energies, protecting from the vulnerability of true creation.
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